Divorce Mediation
I provide low-cost, culturally sensitive, divorce mediation services
as a service to the community.
Growing up as a US-born outlander amidst an immigrant, collectivistic culture and conservative, patriarchal family background where people stay married no matter the dire consequences, I have gained an appreciation for individual’s need for choices and, more importantly, need for support to exercise those choices to regain their freedom, hope, and self-identity.
That relationships will shift and change like the tides that ebb and flow on the ocean shore, is a fact of life.
Getting stuck in a relationship that has ended due to the various complications of legal marriage doesn’t have to be, nor does being at war with someone whom you used to love.
I will support you in generating creative solutions to help you navigate such change
with peace and acceptance.
I have always liked helping others reach a mutual understanding of the plurality of truth, the benefit of holding different, frequently opposing, views in our minds at the same time. It was difficult for me to practice as a traditional attorney, advocating for one version, one person’s truth. The mediation process allows each person to express their views, while reaching compromises that consider and respect both party’s needs, acknowledging the complexity and nuance of our relational experience.
The central benefit of mediation is its ability to give clients control and options informed by but not rigidly limited to the law or arbitrary interpretations of the law, during a time when individuals can’t help but be emotional and disoriented.
When people come together, the space between them is a living entity. There’s more space for empathy within the mediation process than within the legal system, making room for grief that couples inevitably must work through as they are coming apart and letting go of what lived between them. In addition to dividing up assets and devising parenting plans, I work to maximize what clients salvage through this grief process, to help facilitate clients’ transition into a new phase of their life. Often times this involves leveraging clients’ freedom to move past a situation that is not working for them.
As part of the mediation process, we will come up with a divorce mission statement to enshrine rules for how you will relate to one another moving forward, use a road map to develop an overview of your assets, debts, income, and expenses, collaboratively generate a marital settlement agreement documenting our progress, as well as develop a parenting plan that considers the best interests of any children that may be impacted by your coming apart.
Clarification of Services: While I am licensed attorney and psychotherapist, for legal and ethical reasons, I cannot serve multiple roles for a single client. When I am serving as a mediator, I do not serve as the couple’s or either party’s attorney (providing legal advice) or psychotherapist (providing psychotherapy). Furthermore, I may not provide legal representation or psychotherapy for couples/individuals for whom I have previously served as mediator.